Vol. XXI No. 2
October 2005

Facing Issues of Sexuality

Dear Shrink Rap:

I am a gay student who has had very positive experiences here at Juilliard, and I have found this to be a supportive community. What I am scared about is whether the world, especially the performing arts world, will accept me and if being openly gay will have a negative impact on my performing arts career. Do you have any insight or advice for me?

—Skeptical

Dear Skeptical:

We really like this question because it brings up an important point about which everyone, not just individuals with concerns about sexuality, should have an awareness.

We must understand the limits of what we can control, and what is beyond our control but which we can work to change. One thing that you can control is how you educate yourself about the world you will be entering. Last year, the Drama Division hosted a great panel discussion on sexuality issues in the worlds of theater, television, and cinema. A professional actor, a director, a casting director, and two Juilliard faculty members participated in a candid and thought-provoking presentation to students, faculty, and staff. They shared their personal experiences and perceptions about the realities of being gay in these competitive fields, and then students were able to ask questions and share their concerns. Students who attended learned that these professionals had many more positive and encouraging tales than experiences that were negative or discouraging. We hope that more panels like this one will take place at the School.

Understanding your inner world and accepting yourself is one of the secrets to survival and success in a world that can be competitive, unfair, and unpredictable.
Another way to be sure you have some control over your future is to address your own mental health needs. If you have any worries, uncertainties, fears, or other troubling emotions about your sexuality, we encourage you to talk with a therapist in our Counseling Service. A therapist has respect for people's differences, and can help you decipher and come to terms with messages you get from the outside world and from your own inner voice. A therapist can help you work through the obstacles that attitudes and opinions (including your own!) can present in your quest to be a performing artist. You may have grown up surrounded by messages of prejudice and judgment because homosexuality is a subject that has borne many negative implications in this culture. It is only natural that in recognizing your sexuality, you are struggling to come to terms with the messages you have heard, some of which may subconsciously be part of your own belief and value system. Gaining an understanding of your inner world will lead to acceptance of yourself, your feelings, and your ideas. This is one of the secrets to being able to function and succeed in an outside world that is sometimes unpredictable, unfair, biased, and competitive, as well as coping with other negative or challenging aspects of life that are beyond our control.

Finally, in both personal and professional settings you will be confronted on a regular basis with the need to decide how much of yourself to reveal in a given situation. This, of course, is not unique to being gay. But the issue of one's sexuality is not so fraught with potential problems for heterosexual individuals (although the revelation of a heterosexual's sexual behaviors might also evoke prejudice and judgment, and have repercussions on a career). First and foremost, you must be comfortable with yourself in order to have clarity in weighing the pros and cons of telling anyone—whether it is a friend, family member, co-worker, or boss—any intimate detail about yourself. Sexuality is too important to one's sense of well-being for it to be left unresolved. If you have strong self-esteem and self-awareness, you will not make the decision to reveal your sexuality in order to fulfill an inner need that leaves you vulnerable to whatever reaction you get.

The Juilliard Counseling Service is a safe and supportive place where you can speak confidentially with a professional. Our services are free and we have daytime, evening and Saturday hours.

Shrink Rap is the monthly advice column of the Juilliard Counseling Service. Students are invited to submit anonymous questions that we can print and answer here by using our suggestion box, located in the hall outside the Counseling Service on the 22nd floor of the Rose Building.
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