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Jonathan Soons
The first words Jonathan spoke were probably in Spanish (as an infant, he was shuttled back and forth across the channel from England to Spain, where his mother's family lives). He also followed his father from job to job in Scotland, Jamaica, and Mexico before returning to England when he was a teenager. Soons arrived in the U.S. at 21. He has worked at Juilliard for four and a half years.
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| Jonathan Soons around age 6. |
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What is the strangest job you've ever had and what made it strange? In college, I was a dishwasher at the Hungry Persian in Cambridge, Mass. I worked with an ex-marine who had knifed a coworker in the ribs, an alcoholic boss, and waitresses who distrusted me because I disapproved of hiding wine and champagne bottles in the dumpster to be harvested after hours. I tried to supplement my income by betting the boss $100 I could pick up 30 glasses with just my bare hands. He thought this was a ruse, so he didn't go for it. I pretended I was more drunk than I really was and added, "O.K, how about 60 glasses, then?" (This was a ruse, by the way.) He couldn't resist. I proceeded to methodically hook a mug handle on each finger and place a large glass in every mug, then smaller glasses in each large glass. The staff realized I was about to succeed; the boss backed out of the bet and I rose highly in everyone's esteem.What job at Juilliard would you like to try out for a day and why?I fantasize about being the person who makes irreversible edicts about decor and dress and ambience, so that I can impose a bucolic motif on chamber music get-togethers and a sci-fi theme on the electronic music crowd.If out of the blue your boss said to take the day off, what would you do with your free time?I have razzed my wife mercilessly about her shopping sorties. This has backfired so that I dare not set foot in a shop with any purpose that betrays vanity or luxury or indulgence. I must always have a mundane purpose like food-shopping (for staples only) or buying cat litter or nails. I would use a secret day off to sneak down to Canal Street and buy an army surplus camo hat, which I have had a quiet desire for lately. I would keep it at work for a while till it got a little tattered, then take it home and pretend that I found it.Do you have a background in music, dance, or drama? When I was 8 or 9, I won a prize in an accordion contest. Then came puberty and the conviction that life was short. Consequently, I abandoned all pursuits other than seizing the slippery, fleeting present and worrying about an uncertain future. Now all my experiences of artistic expression are accompanied by regret. Recently I was in Mexico City near the Zócalo with my wife and we saw a hurdy-gurdy, the first she had ever seen. It was playing the same folk song I played on stage. I wondered if my interpretation had been any better than the hurdy-gurdy's.What kind of performances do you prefer to attend and why?I get excited about performances where something is likely to happen that is completely unexpected and unrehearsed. Realistically, I am more likely to go to a movie with someone who has thoroughly researched the reviews, and I decide to tag along at the last minute because I am getting a bad reputation for never going out.What other pursuits are you passionate about?I own four or five Land Rovers manufactured between 1961 and 1963. I hope, one day, to make one drivable. People are tolerant of stamp collectors, no matter how many stamps they own, but when it comes to collecting Land Rovers, people ascribe this to a mental lapse or an obsession. It is so unfair.What was the best vacation you've had?When I was a teenager I went to the Isle of Wight with a schoolmate. We set up our Boy Scout tent all over the island. On the last day we had only our ferry ticket back, no money, and less than half a box of corn flakes between us. On the deck of the ferry was a hound lying on his side with his ear stretched out as though he had an ear to the deck. I told my friend Mick that this reminded me of the joke about Tonto, whom the Lone Ranger finds listening intently to the ground. Tonto proceeds to describe a stage coach in detail, down to the color of the horses. The Lone Ranger is flabbergasted and says, "You can tell all that by listening to the ground?" And Tonto replies, "No, they just ran over my head!" We laughed uncontrollably for a good long while, then ate the dry corn flakes. It is amazing how markedly the light-headedness from hunger will improve a joke as well as a very mediocre meal.
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